March 4th, 2010 slabdyno
me: no go hiking to find new boulders the thing you always say you do, but never actually do
GET OUT THERE
SON
Tim: die
i have a job
me: OMG
Tim: and plenty to do
me: like
3 days a week
you have to set out some shoes
Tim: i have no time to do that shit. leave it to andy who doesnt fucking have a job
me: and be all
size 8 son
Tim: huh?
me: if you don’t contribute
Tim: WTF ARE YOU GAPPIN ABOUT?
me: then we won’t take you to the new area
Tim: child please
me: so get the fuck out there
and hike in the snow
Tim: c’mon son
how have i not contributed?
me: i’m gonna rub your face in the snow
if you don’t immediately say you are sorry
you haven’t hiked anywhere
Tim: i am not sorry
me: do i have to spell it all out
Tim: and yes i have
me: GO FUCKING HIKE
OR GET BEAT UP
your choice
Tim: YOU GO FOR A FUCKING HIKE
me: ok
you’re gonna catch the vicious beat down son
i wouldn’t even respond to me again
until after i hand it out to you
dont’ do it
stop now
Tim: WHAT THE FUCK EVER SON. GET THE FUCK ON OUTTA HERE WITH DAT BULLLLL SHIT
me: beatdown doubled
Tim: yall need to go fucking send my problems
ever think of that?
me: there aren’t any
and they all suck
Tim: ever think that some of my ascents have only seen one or two repeats?
Tim: bishes have no clue
me: all the boys say, “tims problems are for girls”
Tim: CAUSE NONE OF THEM HAVE DONE THEM
me: then they are all, let the girls climb them
that is going on bass
Tim: well, when you do glamorpuss, dark foreboding and pulled apart, get back to me.
me: basically you’re gonnna get beat down
Tim: bring it
you fail
ill go for a hike when you do ONE of my problems
youve done NONE
and ive spent a shit load of time on your problems, at your areas to keep up with “you guys”
cause im “lame” if i dont repeat “y’alls” problems
so just remember. YOURE GETTING THE BEAT DOWN NOW SON.
me: not really
no one said you were lame….. because of that…
me: actually, i climbed “super vagmo direct” last year. v2-
Tim: hows your finger?
Tim: i mean elbow
me: ready to drop on your face
go for a hike.
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February 28th, 2010 menstruation station
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February 27th, 2010 automated
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February 24th, 2010 BigAndy
On its side for 12 hrs, and still starts first try when righted. NBD. Ride home was a bit drafty
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February 23rd, 2010 optimistic
BREAKING NEWS: 2-22-10
On a recent trip to work out the final moves of the Gunx classic “The Andrew Zalewski Traverse,” I came upon this. It seems as if there is an epidemic around the world right now of “famous” and “classic” and “bad ass” lines that have been broken or damaged. Recently damaged ultra famous boulder problems are as follows but not limited to: The Andrew Zalewski Traverse, The Beautiful and the Damned, Dreamtime, Fatman, Karma, The Mandala, and Witness the Fitness.
Details are slim, but it appears that the perpetrator of these events, our assailant as it was, has been eating too many blonde oreos in an attempt to “train” and has been destroying national bouldering treasures left and right. In his pursuit of bouldering fame and glory, he has been seen traveling with a rebuttal sign to counter responses that he has broken these problems. One source, who requested to remain anonymous, captured this picture of the vandal at a bar.
If you see this man, who is roughly 6′7″ and 260, please refrain from confronting him. He is armed and dangerous and is reportedly carrying around “huge guns” and “mad skillz.” If you do see this man, please send an email to news@bassforyourface.com.
While the future of “The Andrew Zalewski Traverse” is unknown, future rising stars have reclaimed other vandalized problems. Recently Adam Ondra has repeated Dreamtime and we can only hope he will come to re-climb this timeless classic. Only time will tell.
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February 21st, 2010 menstruation station
http://deadpointmag.com/articles/view/alex-johnson-sends-diaphanous-sea
“In other Hueco news, FEMALE XX1 made the second female ascent of The Butterpumper on East Mountain. The Butterpumper was originally given V12, but since the kneebar was discovered it has generally been considered to be easier (though a consensus has not yet been reached as to the grade). With excellent beta from Hueco strong woman FEMALE XX2, XX1 climbed it in a little over an hour. Three days later she went back and repeated it from a slightly lower start, putting the knee in after she pulled off the ground, instead of before“
ZOMG!! Second female ascent - S.F.A.s!!!! 2XXFFA!!! Kneebars AFTER starting - K.A.S.F.A.!! Then I heard dat dey put grweasy things on da holds and den did the rock climb again!! Grweasy holds!!! G.H.F.A.!! AND DEN someone told a rweawy funny joke whilst rock climbing, and she did da rock climb again!!! Jokes!! J.F.A.!!!
A seriously fine piece of journalism.
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February 15th, 2010 optimistic
Team Work!
Andy’s own reusable kleenex!
C’MON SON!!!!!!
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February 11th, 2010 Paul
Awhile back our friends from Projekt Media made it to NY to shoot a video on recent Gunks development called Eastern Flava!
The boys are back with their new short for Dead Point Magazine featuring Jimmy Webb, Brion Voges and Brad Weaver on some of Tennessee’s finest stone!
I’d love to say tons of amazing thing about these guys, but I’m not going to. Check it out for yourself.
The South’s Strongest
Eastern Flava
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February 10th, 2010 Paul
Great Barrington looks good. Who’s in?
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